8 Secrets to a Long Lasting Relationship

Life

8 Secrets to a Long Lasting Relationship

Feb 6, 2015 //

What’s the key to a long lasting relationship? It’s as easy as a smile, as warm as a hug and overflowing with laughter. Love is the definition of compassion, caring and closeness between two people.

Keep the love alive all the time with these secrets to a long lasting relationship:

1. Refrain from Continuous Complaints about the Same Thing

Face it, no matter how many times you repeat yourself, it will not change your partner’s actions. We all have faults, and if your significant other is a messy person, chances are this is not going to change anytime soon.

Our character traits are simply a part of our personality–a unique idiosyncrasy–and to expect change from another is like asking your partner to become someone they are not.

2. Maintain Your Individual Identities

Just because you’re sure to be married, already “hitched” or have a family doesn’t mean that you should go ahead and combine your names together in all settings. Don’t lose your personal sense of identity–this means it’s possible to have separate friends, hobbies and even leisurely activities.

Moreover, it’s important for you and your partner to be able to escape and deal with personal stress and issues that you would rather not push on the other or bring into the relationship.

3. Communicate Your Hopes and Fears

Communication in general is an important aspect of your relationship. Similarly there are your hopes and fears that really need to be shared with your partner.

When you talk about future, do you dream? If so, start dreaming together. Sharing your hopes helps you both get a sense of excitement for events to come. And when you are feeling blue, share your fears. Your partner may help extinguish the worst of the worries in your mind.

4. Stop Expecting and Start Giving

Never expect anything from your partner, but always give what you personally expect. Follow the golden rule–treat them with dignity and respect. You might take it personal, when your partner doesn’t seem to be holding up their end of the relationship. But sometimes we are expecting our partner to be at their best at all times. Everyone goes through phases of stress in life, so be sure you aren’t expecting ideal behavior all day every day–this is simply unrealistic.

5. Always Choose Laughter, Smiles and Hugs

When life gets you down, there’s always room for a laugh. Laughter lifts everyone up to a higher vibration, while a spot of sorrow poisons the whole mood of the room.

Depression is contagious in a relationship, so be sure to share a smile. A smile, a hug and a good laugh can change your mood drastically. Hugging can actually reduce pain during times of great stress–when we hug our body produces oxytocin- happy hormone. And smile is contagious- psychology says others tend to mirror our expressions. Inspire the smile in your partner.

6. Respect Each Other’s Boundaries

Don’t go snooping–this is a violation of trust. Never sneak in your partner’s stuff, even if you think you can get away with it. Most people feel immediately offended or violated when someone looks through their stuff without permission- even if they have nothing to hide. Then, it just comes as an insult.

Your partner needs to know that, if no one else, they can trust you. If the one person in the world they rely on breaks this bond, then it is very hard to earn back the lost respect.

7. Don’t Be Cruel–This is the End

You can’t expect to have a healthy relationship, when you both are acting cruel. Regardless of whether or not the other did something wrong, acting cruel is adding more harm to the wrong. This will eventually leave your relationship spinning out of control. There is no easy way to come back from cruelty in a relationship, because more than anything else people remember the way you make them feel.

If you are belittling, mean, argumentative or cruel, your partner may not leave you, but they will certainly lose respect for you if they respect themselves.

8. Be Caring, Compassionate and Close

Above all other things, you need to let your partner know that you care. Pay close attention to your partner, notice things and listen. Be close in your relationship and your friendship with each other–since intimacy and companionship are two completely different realms of love.

 

Source:

Amber Racer

Amber is a creative writer who practices qi gong and traditional Japanese martial arts techniques that date back to the samurai (Jinenkan). She founded The Oracle's Library indie publisher of Philosophy and loves to share her curious passion for mind-body-spirit topics, natural remedies, and good health practices with others.

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